Fuck

I feel like shit. Mostly.

You see how I modify my statement? Make it not-absolute? For to be absolute is to be incorrect. For I perceive absolutes to so rarely exist. Let me try again.

I feel like shit.

Ahhh, there, no modification. I trust my audience to filter my statement and come to the conclusion that shit is not the entirety of what I feel. I also trust them to understand the metaphor, or whatever it is, and realize I don't feel like shit in actuality. I simply mean that I feel sad, angry, frustrated, fearful, hateful, disgusted, and/or confused in some mixture. A recipe that might list those things as the ingredients and then tell one to mix in a human body for a certain amount of time at a certain heat and bad comes out. It might then briefly explain that bad is a synonym for shit.

I'm not going to delve into the causes for this finely baked good, because this is not a place I want to do it.

Is it not interesting how dreams lose their flavor? Passions fall by the wayside.

It is sometimes reassuring to realize that while I am a small, fucked-up, crippled ass of a man, I am also God.

Now tell me, is that not a little bit of feel better medicine?

Shanti om, hari om, shanti om.

I really need to learn some prayers in a language I speak.

Of inordinate size.

I would like to make this clear: this is not of a size that is standard. It is dimensionally rare, geometrically absurd. This is not a normal size, content to live within picket fences.

It yearns to be free.

Nightfall, scattered suburb lights like stars fallen to earth, the object may attempt its escape. Vast planes quiver and vortexes shiver with powerful emotion as it breaches the first of the gates.

No way out, says a voice. No way out but through change.

X-Y-Z tilts a little, than rights itself. It shivers and quivers anew.

Become smaller, says the voice. Then you can fit through that crack--right there! It is easy to see.

The quivering halts. The shivering stops. Portions of stuff move, creak, rattle.

Then stop.

It has thought of a truth. And that truth cannot be undone.